Today is Valentine’s Day so lets talk about what that means to you.
Are you the kind of person who thinks Valentine’s Day is just a bunch of hoowie? Just a way for consumers to spend money and retail is the big winner?
Maybe you are the type that really enjoys Valentine’s Day and all the gifts that could come with it. Romantic dinner, flowers and candy! Go ahead honey go all out for me kind of day. One of the few times your spouse really puts some effort into romancing you.
Do you dread Valentine’s Day because it puts a lot of pressure on you to be more than you normally are? You feel you have to do something or your spouse will be upset, but really you wish it would go away because you do not seem to live up to the expectations of your spouse.
When we were first married, we did not have money to get gifts for each other. I am a gift loving romantic. My husband is not. I was lucky to get a card and that might have been all for many years. We were so busy trying to build our business that we really did not have time for Valentine’s Day. He was working in the evenings and I was working during the day so it was almost like “never the two shall meet” kind of life for a while.
One solution we had to this is we would celebrate Valentine’s Day every four years on Leap Day. Every Feb. 29th we took time off and scheduled a date with each other. The first one was a picnic lunch and then we went to the movies. Then we went thirty minutes out of town for dinner and spent the night at a hotel. On Valentine’s Day we gave each other cards and move on to a regular day.
Nowadays, we do both. I don’t need $50 – $100 flowers to feel special so he goes to Costco and picks up a $20 – $25 bouquet. We have cards and most of the time he gives me a gift from one of my favorite stores. I used to get him gifts too but throughout the years I have learned that he either returns my gift or doesn’t really find value in it. He is not a gift man, he is an acts of service man. So if I take his truck to get washed and detailed then he really appreciates that. If I make his favorite dessert or give him a gift certificate for someplace he likes to go to and have an adventure then he is good.
~In case you have not read Gary Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages I would recommend that you get it and you and your spouse read it together. Or it is on audio so you can listen to it together.
~If you are looking for some quick, easy and inexpensive ways to date your spouse go back to my posting “21 Inexpensive Dates” to get some ideas.
Like I said I am the one who likes the romance. I have dream dates that will likely never happen. Like my husband arriving at the office in a limousine, dressed in a tuxedo with the bouquet of flowers to whisk me off on a romantic getaway. My luggage is packed with a beautiful new dress that is perfect for me and of course the cutest shoes and handbag to match. He has handled all the necessary issues with kids, pets and work and we leave our cell phones off and we take time off to just enjoy each other.
Who wants this for themselves too?
What is your dream date look like with your spouse?
The main reason we choose to celebrate Valentine’s Day is because in marriage it is easy to get stuck in our same old comfortable routine. Every holiday/event day should be celebrated so that you commit to take the time away from the regular and step into discovering more ways to have fun with your spouse. It does not have to cost you money, it will however cost you time.
Learn a new card game to play, pull out a board game and play as if you have nothing to lose or relate it to your life right now. Invite friends over for a potluck, make it a time when you invite singles over to your home so they are not alone. Get creative and have fun finding ways to be with and discover more about each other. I still learn things about my husband and we have been together for almost twenty four years. I make a conscious effort to learn more about him because he is growing as he does new things in life and I change so I can look at things he has done forever with a new view on it.
If you think Valentine’s Day is hoowie then make sure to find time to connect with each other on a regular basis. Love the romance then go all out with what is in your budget to do. Keep the pressure out by communicating with each other about what your expectations for this day or romance in general. You will have a much better time with each other.
Today I wish you the kind of love your heart is meant for. Whether you are married or not, in a relationship or not, find something today that expresses love. Look in the mirror and tell yourself that you love you. Go out and do something you like for you or do something for someone else. Buy some kids valentines cards and hand them out on the street. Anything to get you to celebrate love today. Enjoy celebrating love today.